Stupid & Funny from Around the World

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

An old man was walking in the Sahara desert with his donkey when he reached a village. The people welcomed him with everything they could, offering him hospitality, taking care of his donkey, and feeding him.
While having dinner, he was surprised to be offered camel milk, as it is of notoriously bad taste. He thus asked about it and was told that the village has been cursed with an everlasting drought, and that the people have resorted to saving however little water they could find for crops.
"Truth be told, I am one of the wise.", he said, "I know how to bring you rain. However, you must first bring me a wide bucket full of water, for I need some to bring more."
The next morning, all of the villagers heard of his saying, and started collecting every drop of water they still had in reserve. In the end, there was barely enough to qualify for a bucket, and they gave it to the man.
He then took the water, and walked within his host's house. There, he took off his dirty clothes, and started washing them. A curious one of the kids saw him through the window, and went on to alert everyone around.
By the time they arrived, angry and shouting, it was already too late. The old man was hanging his last piece of cloth to dry.
"Shame! Shame on you, old hag, for wasting our water when our kids don't have enough to drink!" said the chief.
But as soon as he finished speaking, the sky darkened as the clouds gathered around the village. It rained for 7 days and 7 nights. People got their fill, and everyone's reserves were overflowing. The old man was treated as a guest of honor, and a hero, and the chief apologised profusely for ever doubting him.
Only when he was about to leave, had the kid gathered the courage to ask about how he did it. "It's simple" said the old man "It's always when I hang my clothes to dry it starts to bloody rain"

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

A bus full of ugly folks from a small Midwest town crashes into a truck, and sadly, everyone on board passes away.
When they arrive at the pearly gates, they meet God, who feels sorry for what they’ve been through and offers each of them one wish before entering Heaven.
They line up, and God asks the first person what they’d like.
“I want to be beautiful,” she says.
God snaps His fingers, and just like that, she’s stunning.
The next person sees this and says, “I want to be beautiful too.”
Another snap, and it’s done.
This keeps going down the line—each person asking for the same thing.
But all the way at the back, the last guy in line starts chuckling.
As the line moves forward, his chuckle turns into full-on laughter.
With ten people left, he’s bent over, howling.
Finally, it’s his turn.
God looks at him and asks, “What’s your wish?”
The man wipes away tears of laughter and says,
“Make ’em all ugly again.”

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

 

[Hakwa Nadro]

I had a lovely phone conversation today with a very polite young chap who said he was calling from Microsoft.
“Hello, saar, how are you doing today?”
“I’m very well, thank you for asking. And how are you? More importantly… WHO are you?”
“Saar, my name is Gupta, and I’m calling phrom Microsoft.”
“Microsoft, eh? Is that a city out there somewhere? How’s the weather today — hot, or is it monsoon season? I’ve seen those National Geographic documentaries… that’s some serious rain!”

“No, saar, the weather is bery good. I am calling phrom MICROSOFT — the computer kampany — Mr. Bill Gates’ kampany. We have phound a serious problem with your computer…”
“REALLY? My computer? Well, that’s very worrying…”

“Yes, saar, it could become catastrophic for your piles, your passwords, even your internet banking! But don’t worry — I can fix it for you…”
“No,” I interrupted, “it’s worrying because… I don’t actually HAVE a computer.”
Silence.
“You don’t, saar?”
“I don’t, Gupta. No computer.”
“Ahhh… then it must be your laptop.”
“Gupta.”
“Yes, saarr?”
“I don’t have one.”
“An iPad?”
“Nope.”
“A tablet?”
“Nope. None of those.”
Pause.
“As a matter of fact, Gupta… I don’t even have a telephone.”
A few seconds of tense silence.
Then he says,
“Ah, saar… now you are lying to me!”
I replied,
“Well… you started it!”

And I hung up.